by Deanna Mascle

Question: Which is stronger — concrete or bone?

Answer: Bone

Useless Fact: Human bones can actually resist 40 times more stress than concrete. Don’t believe it is true? Then picture a piece of concrete the size of a bone and imagine how easily it would break.

Question: What bird lays its egg in another bird’s nest?

Answer: Cuckoo, Cowbird, Whyda, Honeyguide and Black-headed Duck

Useless Fact: These birds, called brood parasites, lay their eggs in another bird’s nest and let the other bird parents feed and raise their chicks. The “egg abandoner” is then free to mate again and lay more eggs in another nest. The cuckoo is the best known brood parasite and an expert in the art of cruel deception. Its strategy involves stealth, surprise and speed. The mother removes one egg laid by the host mother, lays her own and flies off with the host egg in her bill. The whole process takes barely ten seconds. Cuckoos parasitize the nests of a large variety of bird species and carefully mimic the colour and pattern of their own eggs to match that of their hosts. Each female cuckoo specializes on one particular host species. How the cuckoo manages to lay eggs to imitate each host’s eggs so accurately is one of nature’s main mysteries.

Question: What is the largest invertebrate?

Answer: Colossal Squid

Useless Fact: A species of squid reported to be significantly larger than the giant squid, is called the Colossal squid, officially named Mesonychoteuthis hamiltoni. In February 2007 a live colossal squid was brought to the surface in Antarctic waters by a New Zealand fishing boat. This enormous squid, which was determined to be a male of the species, was 10 meters (32.8 feet), and weighed 450 kilograms (992 pounds), making it the largest squid (the largest invertebrate) ever captured. What is even more astonishing is that, from what scientists know about squid species in general, there is great sexual dimorphism in squids, with females being significantly larger than the males. If that holds true for the Colossal squid, this male specimen that was captured could very well be dwarfed by a much larger female of the species.

Question: What does the first letter of a radio station’s call sign mean?

Answer: The location of the station

Useless Fact: Generally, in the United States, call signs begin with K west of the Mississippi River, and W to the east.

Question: Where was the first McD0nald’s located?

Answer: Arcada, California

Useless Fact: Brothers Dick and Mac McDonald open a hot dog stand called the Airdome in Arcadia, California. In 1940, the brothers move to San Bernardino, California, on Route 66. After noting that almost all of their profits came from hamburgers, the brothers close down the restaurant for several months in 1948 to implement their innovative “Speedee Service System”, a streamlined assembly line for hamburgers.

Question: What is the largest insect?

Answer: Acteon Beetle or Longhorn Beetle

Useless Fact: There are different ways of measuring the size of an insect, most people would consider the largest insect to be the bulkiest and in that case the largest insect is the Acteaeom Beetle from South America. The male beetles can be 9cms long by 5cms wide by 4cms thick. If you want to measure largest by overall size, check out the South American Longhorn Beetle (Titanus giganteus) these giants can be over 16cms in body length (not including antennae) One other beetle, Dynastes hercules is also well known for reaching 16cms in length though it is not nearly as heavy. The longest insect in the world is the Stick-Insect (Pharnacia serritypes), the females of which can be over 36cm long.
About the Author
Are you looking for more useless facts? Then try http://uselessfactsonline.com
]]> http://www.pleasureislandonline.com/2007/10/20/useless-facts-and-fun-trivia-questions-and-answers/feed/ 0 http://www.pleasureislandonline.com/2007/03/31/humor-18-similarities-between-women-and-computers/ http://www.pleasureislandonline.com/2007/03/31/humor-18-similarities-between-women-and-computers/#comments Sat, 31 Mar 2007 23:02:33 +0000 Christine http://www.pleasureislandonline.com/?p=188

by Jack Reider

Have you ever wondered in what way are women like the computers we have at home? Here, I show you how.

Before you read any further, please note that this is not a piece out to damage or cut down the important role of women in our society. Read below only as humour and nothing more. These are intended solely for a good laugh.

Women are unique in many ways (and by this I mean different than men) and its this specific uniqueness or certain traits that I refer to when likening a woman to a personal computer. Do not get offended; it is intended to create a smile.

1) A woman is like a computer in that she costs more than you thought it would.

2) A woman resembles a personal computer in that she will not do exactly what you thought it will.

3) After a while, you simply cannot do without both: your computers and your woman.

4) Computers are just like women: after you have gotten used to them and cannot do without them, you discover that one is not enough.

5) Some computers, like some women, serve many people.

6) You can work miracles with both by gently using your fingers if you only know the proper code.

7) If you are inactive with them for more than fifteen minutes, they go off.

Just like a computer, the one who runs her has more privileges than just anyone else who is just running her.

9) When there are short-circuits of electricity, they shut you off and then you cannot always return to what was before the short-circuit.

10) Normally, they are available and receptive in the night, but it’s a lot better when they are available and receptive in the morning.

11) When you are, at last, sure that they will do what you wanted, they go off and do something else.

12) The only thing that you predict about the future with them is that they will react unpredictably.

13) Just like women, so too for computers: every year a new model is released that is younger, more advanced and gives a lot more.

14) A woman is just like a computer: you are happy with what you have but when you see what your friends have got, you are sure you want what they have.

15) Women are like computers in that no matter how much you improve and put into them, they only improve for a short time and then go back to their same old pace.

16) Women are like computers in that every day a new program comes out promising to revolutionize your knowledge and use of them, but after spending a lot more cash you realize that none of them work better than the old one you had before.

17) Women are like computers: you always want what others have and they want what you have but you cannot switch even for a trial basis.

18) Women are like computers in that when you get them you are sure that they are the best. But when the days go back, you wonder why you did not get them with a replacement note.
About the AuthorWhen not editing an online casino portal, Jack Reider makes up and post jokes on various subjects. Go to http://www.gambling-portal.com and read some more.

Humor: Humor: 18 Similarities Between Women and Computers

by Stupid Wisdom

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Golfing 3.6.

I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn’t work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,

Troubled User

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application “Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

About the author:

The author is a website owner with a sense of humor. Visit my blog at Stupid Wisdom
Humor

by Ross Lambert

First, allow me a moment to elucidate my qualifications: My grandpa was a bootlegger in the backwoods of Tennessee during prohibition. That’s God’s honest truth, and that bit of family history proves without question that I have both redneck DNA and an intimate knowledge of alcoholic beverages. Gramps’ legacy lives on.

Both of those bits of trivia are worthy of much greater discussion, but today I need to stick to the point. So, let’s take a look at our subject du jour, the Big Vino, the juice of the gods, that is to say, wine.

The first big thing to understand, Bubba (or Bubbette–we rednecks have advanced with the times), is that wine ain’t 7-UP. Now, I know that many of you are used to mixing wine and 7-UP, but the point of this little article is to provide an opportunity for personal growth. Keep reading, or maybe have your kid read it out loud.

Now what I mean by saying that wine ain’t 7-UP is simply this: If you bought a can of 7-UP down at Elmer’s Market and then drove to your uncle Willie’s Gas & Groc and bought another can, you’d expect both cans to taste the same, assuming Uncle Willie’s half-brother had not done something really disturbing again. Most of us consider the fact that one can tastes just like every other to be a Good Thang.

Not so, with wine. Rather than mixing together chemicals and water in a top-secret combination to yield identical tasting drinks, wine makers have to rely on Mother Nature. And we all know that Mother Nature can be a… bit fickle. In addition to the wine maker’s skill, the grape, the soil, the storage, and even the weather during the growing year all have a tremendous effect on the taste of a given vintage.

This explains Uncle Willie’s homebrew, of course: Combine a winemaker with no skill, incredibly disgusting grapes thrown out by the Piggly Wiggly store, the fungus-inducing weather of the Deep South, soil worthy of an EPA Superfund site, and long-term storage in plastic buckets, and you get a vintage that works better as concrete cleaner.

The Yin to that Yang is a skilled vintner who has studied his craft for years, grapes cultivated on the warm southern-facing slopes of the Columbia River Basin or Cascade Mountains, 300 days of sunshine per year with cool, crisp nights during harvest, nutrient-rich volcanic soil, and long-term oak or stainless steel barrel storage, and you have the magnificent wines of Washington State. They don’t all taste the same, of course, due to different local soils, weather conditions, and different wine makers. But I assure you, Bubba/Bubbette, that is a really Good Thang.

Part of the fun of being a wineaux, i.e. a redneck who likes good wines, is the search for the elusive “great vintage”. Since no two vintages taste the same, it is incumbent upon us to taste lots and lots of wines from different vintages. That’s a Good Thang, too, as you might imagine. Now, you’ll find some hoity toities who will try to tell you what’s good and what ain’t, but here’s the real truth: A good wine is a wine you like. Period, end of story. Anybody tells you different, tell ‘em to put a cork in it.

At first, I didn’t drink for taste. Like most of my redneck kin, I drank because I was, uh… thirsty. But if you slow down and actually start thinking about the taste a bit, I guarantee you’ll find some wines that tickle your fancy.

Having found some great vintages (and write them down when you find them, or buy a case or two), the next Good Thang about wine is that it was made for food. Yep, fer shure. Unlike Uncle Willie’s homebrew, you’ll not only be able to keep your food down when you have a good wine, you’ll find that some wines actually make the food taste better. And I don’t mean after the second or third bottle. I really mean that you can be stone cold sober, take a sip of wine, shovel in bit of food, and both the wine and the food will taste better together than either does alone.

In case those instructions are not clear, please understand that I mean that you should swallow the wine first, and then take a bite of food. As tempting as it might be to try to mix it all up together, wine ain’t a milkshake, neither. Save that trick for Nestle’s Quick chocolate mix. For those who don’t know, you take a spoonful of chocolate mix in your mouth, pour in some milk, and swish it around. Rednecks from southern states may also add several chunks of banana.

But I digress. Back to wine.

A second fun thing about being a wineaux is finding “wine and food pairings” that you like. There are some general guidelines, but once again, what tastes good to you is really the definition of what is good. Here are a couple things that I’ve found to be true for my tastes:

1. Wine shouldn’t be stronger tasting than the food you’re serving. Hoity toities may scream in anguish, but the first great wine and food pairing that suited me was a California Zinfandel served with hamburgers drowned in a potent barbecue sauce. Zinfandels are often “peppery” in taste and therefore complement a strong barbecue sauce quite well.

Conversely, milder main dishes may call for a lighter wine. I found that some light cheeses go great with Sauvignon Blanc, which is a light and sometimes slightly fruity white wine.

2. Sometimes seemingly odd combinations work out quite well, too. I like blue cheese on crackers with a fairly sweet dessert wine like Roza Riesling. I have no idea why that works for me. Maybe my taste buds are dead from too many pork rinds.

Regardless, wine tasting is an adventure, and a kick in the pants, too. A few years ago I hired a limousine to take me, my wife, and some friends on a wine tasting tour of the Wenatchee Valley in central Washington. Not only was it great fun, but I discovered several fantastic family-operated wineries along the way. We still visit these wineries several times a year for concerts, special dinners, and of course, wine club pick-ups!

By the way, a wine club pick-up is not a new way for you single redneck men to meet women–ya still gotta save that for the family reunion.
About the Author When he’s not writing articles for his fellow rednecks at Redneck-Wineaux.com (http://Redneck-Wineaux.com), Ross Lambert is sampling fine wines and playing guitar. He is also one of several software engineers at Confluent-Data, Inc., creators of LoveWashingtonWine.com (http://LoveWashingtonWine.com

by: Craig Harrison

Many of today’s work environments are rife with moody bosses and co-workers, repetitive tasks and unpredictable market pressures. Stress abounds. Managers often tell me they can’t afford the time or cost for my humor workshops; how can they afford not to address workplace stress.

We know clinically that laughter and play have medicinal qualities, offering physical, psychological and physiological benefits as well. In the workplace, humor and fun can increase productivity, encourage creativity, enhance team building, and thus improve esprit de corps.

While we may not be able to control everything that happens to us in our jobs and work environments, we do have control over how we choose to react. I coach others how to create an environment which is safe and friendly, and use humor to help maintain a healthy balance between the pressure and seriousness which comes from high stakes jobs and a competitive marketplace. Remember that humor starts from within. Being able to laugh at your own foibles goes a long way toward creating a healthy work climate in which to flourish.

The following are activities and strategies for you as individuals, workgroups and managers. Be creative and use these ideas to stimulate your own remedies to workplace stress.

- Adorn your work area with cartoons, headlines or funny photos which bring a smile to your face and visiting co-workers’. Whether you’re surrounded by your favorite Pez dispensers childhood, or wry cartoons that speak to your tastes, let your work area comfort and humor you while taking some of the edge off the standard office decor.

- Tap a co-worker to be your humor-partner. Bring a daily joke to share. Commiserate about funny workplace events. Keep each other buoyed with good cheer. When the chips are down your humor partner can chip away at your depression, and vice versa.

- Don’t think cubicles limit your humor options. I’ve seen shower curtains, umbrellas and other devices used effectively to set a light or semi-serious tone. For some, creativity flourishes behind their cubicle’s shower curtain. People tampering with your work area? Don’t get angry…protect it with yellow “Crime Scene” tape!

- Subscribe to a humor website to be e-mailed a free daily or weekly humorous story, joke and anecdote. Sites such as www.netfunny.com/rhf/ or www.oraclehumor.com/ are two examples.

Are You Laughin’ At Me? One manager, known for his moodiness, acknowledged it with a “Mood-O-Meter” outside his door. Both he and his employees took turns forecasting his mood: from fire-breathing to variable clouds to periodic eruptions…proceed at your own risk. Don’t underestimate the power of self-effacing humor for making yourself more accessible and liked.

Room for Laughter. Some companies designate a room, work area or corner of their office as a romper room, where frolicking and silliness is allowed. Whether yours has a punching bag, games, a dartboard or foosball, it’s a room for letting off steam and taking a break from the grind.

Whine Not. Everyone loathes whiners yet we all need to blow off steam periodically. One group of creative trainers and their manager decreed Thursdays to be effective whining days. They self-policed themselves the rest of the week, making sure not to whine. Yet even their Thursday gripes had a departmental sanction and somehow seemed healthier. After all, they belly ached together. A ripple effect actually improved the morale of departments adjacent to theirs!

Meting Out Humor. Many professionals approach meetings with trepidation. A dash of humor can make a difference. For regular meetings earmark one or two minutes each meeting for a humorous interlude. In one workgroup a “humor hand” rotates from meeting to meeting. Employees take turns setting a lighter tone to the meeting, insuring everybody is engaged. An anecdote, verbal or physical activity focuses the group on the task at hand and brings colleagues together in a spirit of fun.

When not to use Humor. Not all humor is good humor. Humor that hurts, ostracizes or is cruel will have a detrimental effect on others and you. Strive for humor that is inclusive, creative and captures our human essence. By now you know that sexist, racist, ageist jokes and crude humor are not only inappropriate, but can lead to sanctions, termination or even lawsuits. Be sensitive when telling jokes involving terminations, reductions in force (RIFs) and personal tragedies. Their hurt can linger long after the fact. . When in doubt…leave it out!

Appropriate humor can make hard tasks easier, collaborations fun and certainly make workdays go faster. Laugh, and the work world laughs with you!

About The Author

Since the age of eleven when he went door-to-door selling Used Jokes, Craig Harrison has been connecting with customers through humor. As a professional speaker and corporate trainer Craig Harrison’s Expressions of Excellence provides sales and service solutions through speaking. Contact him at (888) 450-0664, through his website http://www.ExpressionsofExcellence.com or via e-mail: humor@craigspeaks.com

by: Steve Gillman

Most riddles are a form of lateral-thinking puzzle. To get them, you have to move laterally in your mind, away from the expected line of thought. This is especially true of funny riddles. What did the others do when the cannibal was late for dinner? They gave him the cold shoulder, of course.

Then there are the riddles that aren’t really jokes, but they make you smile when you hear the answer. If a plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, in which country do they bury the survivors? They don’t bury survivors, of course. Laughter is good for the brain. Okay, I am waiting for the research on that, but it will be proven someday.
Oh, and no political jokes here. By the way, do you know what’s wrong with political jokes? They get elected! Okay, maybe just that one. Here are a few more riddles that will make you smile.

1. What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots tell his students?

2. Is it legal for a man to marry his widow’s sister in the state of California?

3. How many times can you subtract 5 from 25?

4. What two things can never be eaten for breakfast?

5. What did the fish say when he ran into a concrete wall?

6. Imagine you are in a sinking boat and surrounded by sharks. How do you survive?

7. Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain on Earth?

Answers To The Riddles

1. Watch this closely. I’m only going to do this once.

2. Probably not, since he’s dead.

3. Just once, because after you subtract anything from it, it’s not 25 anymore.

4. Lunch and Dinner.

5. “Damn.”

6. Just quit imagining!

7. Mount Everest, of course.

About The Author

Copyright Steve Gillman. For more riddles, and to get the Brain Power Newsletter and other free gifts, visit: http://www.IncreaseBrainPower.com